T minus 31 days.   Swimming day.  Really, I promise.

 Here is my second warning to my fellow Simsbury residents:  you know to stay far away from me when I am biking  Now I am telling you to stay farther away from me after I have been swimming.  First of all, I am crabby.  But more importantly, I am blind as a bat and I am also deaf.  (I also can't smell but that probably doesn't pose as big a problem to those in my immediate vicinity).  I don't really know if you know this, but when  you go swimming you get wet.  Really, really wet.  Everywhere.  I drag my water logged body out of the pool, slosh my way to the car and attempt to drive home. I can't see because my eyes are burning and I can't hear because I have water in both ears.  And I can't stop sneezing because I have so much water up my nose.  And I am on the road.  Driving.

As for the actual swimming....
I don't think the lifeguard realizes that when she focuses on me and only me when I am in the pool it makes me a teensy bit nervous.  I mean, there are other people in the pool after all.  Why isn't she looking at them?  I don't think it really matters that the octogenarians on either side of me are swimming three times as fast as me (one with full apple juice containers in either hand.  Is this a real thing??  Did I miss the memo on apple juice swimming??) or that the man in lane three was in the Olympics because he is swimming at the speed of sound and half his body comes out with each breaststroke and after he executes a  perfect turn he disappears for one second then emerges more than halfway down the pool.   You never know, something could happen to one of them.  Like a juice mishap in lane one.